trustafarian vibration
The albino tarantulas crawl through Southeast Portland, using their trust funds to emulate poverty. Jah good. Jah love dem. Jah make dem feel irie. Jah know dat if dey walk two blocks out de tourist section of Kingston, dey get dey white brains blasted onto de cracked sidewalk.
Dreadlocks—the ugliest hair style ever known—look like clusters of dried dog poop. Reggae—the worst musical format ever invented—sounds like a rusty toilet which has trouble flushing. But if you're sitting in the squalor of Jamaica, at least these things have some resonance for you. On the other hand, if you're walking around the Pacific Northwest in a Vanilla Marley costume, you just look like a douche. Suicidal Caucasian insanity has reached the point where "authenticity" is only achieved by absurdly INAUTHENTIC fashion maneuvers.
There's a reason the Third World came in third.
